darkness for light

what feels like forever ago already, me, my sister, and a friend of ours took a road trip.  the plan was to head east, to ontario, but when the rain hit, we just wanted to follow the sun.  we DID make it to ontario but after one night (of awesome-ness!) the rain started and we came back west trying to find the sun once more.  it is neither fun nor exciting putting a tent up or taking it down in the rain or after it has rained and our friend wasn't much of an 'outdoors woman' so after arriving at one manitoba campground after dark.  in a downpour.  we decided to splurge on a hotel room.  it was sort of strange with rooms built around a common kitchen/living area but it was warm and dry and it had a hot tub and a waterslide. 
now to all you waterslide aficionados this would have been more of a ramp but, i won't lie to you, each one of us was scared to go down it.  you see, it might have been short but it was fully enclosed and looking into it - you could only see blackness.  each one of us DID finally get up enough courage to go down it a few times but, speaking for myself, each time it took awhile to screw up enough courage to do it again.  you'd enter the blackness; you could see nothing in front or behind you - nothing but pinpricks of light above you; you could hear nothing but the rush of water around you, carrying you deeper into the dark; you never knew when you'd hit the dim light and the water of the pool.  i kid you not, it was a strenuous psychological test of how tough you really were.  and then...when you were finally through, when the water of the pool embraced you gently...the RUSH!!  it was amazing!  and you'd head to the hot tub to gather up your courage to do it one more time.
i'm not sure why i started thinking about that night.  it was only one night almost 10 years ago.  but as i was thinking about it, i realized that it makes a good metaphor for life.  there are times when my life feels SO dark.  i can't see what's coming up, i can't go back to the relative safety of the life that i know, i can only go forward hoping that if i keep following those pinpricks of light that i'll eventually come out alright.  when i look back, i can see that those times that seemed SO dark, that took SO long when i was living them DID open up into light.  and, looking back, i can see that they weren't SO bad, they DIDN'T take forever, and, guess what? they made me stronger - in my faith, in myself, in my journey of becoming who i'm meant to be. 
and each time?  it takes slightly less to screw up enough courage to do it again.