my place

after reading maria's post (http://www.backinthehills.weebly.com/), i started thinking about my own sense of place.  it's not something i've really ever given much thought to and part of the reason for that, i think, is because my 'place' is so intrinsically a part of who i am.  indeed, i don't think, actually i KNOW, i would not be this person if it weren't for WHERE i am.  this area, my beloved southwest saskatchewan, is in my bones.  although once i was older, i moved about a bit for school,  i have essentially lived in the same place my entire thirty years.  and, when i moved (for school), this was always HOME.  For me, i suppose, it is about family too.  most of my life, my entire extended family has lived within about one hundred kilometres.  i know the hills around here, i know the trails and where they end up, i know where the sour leaves grow, where the buttercups come up, and where the hills are soft with the purple of crocuses in spring.  i could show you where i first learned to drive a vehicle, and which trail i practiced driving stick.  i can lead you through the fields, now of lentils and peas, then of wheat, to the hills where i spent hours of my free time dreaming, laying on my back looking at the clouds lazily floating by.  the hills where i danced and sang for the pure joy of being alive in this wonderful, open space - this over-looked paradise.  i know the long winters and have grown (again) to love them.  i know the joy of spring as she arrives in subtle but glorious beauty.  i still feel the prickle of prairie wool on my body from the times i lay prostrate on the ground simply to breathe in the gentle smells of clean earth, moss, flowers; of this piece of creation that i call home.  i have fallen asleep to the lullaby of robins singing cheerily in the branches next to my window, anxiously awaited the first meadowlark call that means spring has definitely arrived.  the sound of the wind whipping through the hills calls me home. 

yes, there have been times when i have lusted after other places; places more temperate, places slightly further away where EVERY one DOESN'T know your business and relatives must take a vacation to visit.  but, i've always known deep down that this, THIS IS HOME.  there have been times when i cursed the farming life that stressed my mom and dad so.  but always, i'm a farm girl; a prairie farm girl.  in the city, building and people close in on me and i must find some small green space to still my wildness.  i love travelling, the mountains, the sea, but it is only the prairies with their subtle beauty, their open spaces and hidden secrets that calm my soul and embrace me with the knowledge that I AM HOME.  i've always been a bit of a 'champion for the under-dog' - i have been friends with and defended people who are not your 'typical cool'.  perhaps that too draws the prairies close to my heart.  this is not a typical beauty, the usual paradise; this is a place that grips you, that requires you to look deeper.  this place requires more from you but once it has taken hold of you, once you've known the freedom and the beauty, you will never let go.

the prairie sunsets, the northern lights, the fields of rolling grass and grain, the openness, the solitude...all of this colors me, all of this is HOME.